There is much in the world that catches the eye or fires one's imagination. So we measure our progress and place in the scheme of things and govern ourselves by external things. And yet "it is only with the heart that one truly sees," according to St. Exupery's Little Prince. That is, we mortals look to tangible things for evidence of being on track or straying into sin. However, as the case of the Widow's Mite tells, what to one person is a pittance to another person is their life's savings. Similarly of Jesus' followers who give all their attention and care, it is the ones who are bereft and have nothing more to lose who have ears to hear with. Others are full of themselves or their belongings and preserve things other than God's Way and hold back from a full embrace of God and of one's neighbor.
Relationship-ology or Heart-ology might be a better true name for the narrow way of Jesus in the World. What does the primitive church and the Gospels of Jesus show of beginning and growing relationships to full maturity? The idea of discerning a matter through constant vigilance and prayer amid the wide gray spaces of external actions and words, rather than to hew to black and white dogma, very much touches on effects on one's heart; that is, one's relationship to God and to each other. As such relationships can be described and compared: growing closer, growing more intimately known of each other, of seeing past the externalities to what is intended but perhaps not articulated verbally. The quality of a relationship can be spoken of by its strength, longevity, breadth and depth. And some relationships are tied to a place or time, whereas others are for all times and places. As a person or entire body of believers proceeds on a lifecourse of emergent relationships, one leans on fellows both for navigation (to stay on course) and for motivation (to drive forward or reach beyond one's accustomed level of comfort).
Other words in this exploration of relationship-ology are (self) identity to find the authentic self (since the 1950s, Eric Ericson), muga mushin (Japanese samurai phrase for "no self no heart" to separate the person from the surrounding events of engagement; just 'be' without striving or self-aware reflection), and Carl Jung's discussion of ego (that a person should see beyond this to touch an authentic and larger being. Finally, too, there is the experience of heated conversation, tete a tete, including in a foreign language or mix of one's own language and a foreign one, such that meaning feels like it communicates directly between the people, even though word choice or limitations fail. Perhaps it is tone of voice, non-verbal cues or something telepathic about the other person's intent, but the result is a feeling of direct meaning from one person to the other.