When you pray.... just think how it would be if...

After a few decades the weekly Men's Bible Study still opens and closes with shared prayer, whether 2 or 3 show up or a full table of 9 or 10 are present. Thinking about the range of topics that some of the men voiced during the preamble, "well, what should we pray about today," and reflecting on the words spoken in the course of bowed heads for the praying itself, there seemed to be a recurring intention or purpose that emerged sometimes. Underneath the petitions, praise, and thanks on matters of healing/health for bodies and for spirits, including specific persons and specific struggles, there was an overarching or underlying urgency that God please draw each person closer in stronger relationship and sweeter harmony; that hard hearts remain soft and open to being touched by events in one's own life, as well as in responding with feeling to the events in others lives, whether personally or professionally known or ones farther away whom we do not know closely.

In sum, the bottom line for all of these prayers and all of these decades might be a request to seek God's Will and do his bidding; to listen with care to the direction for one's decisions; to rely on one's heart when looking across the world and when weighing decisions that affect self or one's neighbor. In short, the prayers keep coming back to God is Love; we aspire to be more like God/Jesus and thus overflow in expressing (agape) love of others; and in achieving this posture and outlook in our engagement of the places we find ourselves, thereby to grow deeper connection and stronger feeling with God's Will.

Suppose for a moment that these recurring, ultimate intentions are carried out; that more and more people successfully navigate their lives and relationships by leading with their hearts, not greed, fear, (self) loathing, or some other strong force. How would household life differ; congregational aspirations change; wider community habits and responses to crisis or stress by altered; indeed, how would state and (inter)national decisions proceed differently to different purposes/outcomes to the way things run now with reference to GNP, quarterly profits for shareholders, and externalized costs that a company leaves for future generations to clean up.

Being foreign to this World - book of 1 Peter

screenshot from BibleGateway.com

Lots of wondering points came up in the weekly Bible reading of 1 Peter’s 2nd chapter. The list of bad behavior springing from who you are deep down reads like the reverse of “fruits of the spirit” that grow from seeking God’s Way. The NIV lists these terrible things as …” rid yourselves of all malice and all deceit, hypocrisy, envy, and slander of every kind.” And the Hawai’ian Pidgin verse gives …”No do no bad kine stuffs. No bulai nobody. No say one ting an do anodda. No get jealous. No talk stink notting.” Still another voice (E. Peterson’s The Message), …”Make a clean sweep of malice and pretense, envy and hurtful talk..” here is the link to those comparative verses at BibleGateway dotcom.

Since Peter’s letter is addressing house-churches far from Jerusalem with mixed congregations of Jews and Gentiles, perhaps some of those attending were in the habit of sorting their peers into who is more holy or righteous or closer to God than the others; for example, would it not be natural to project onto the Jews a bit more affinity to the legacies of Rabbi Jesus? How is this human habit addressed in the followers of The Way?

In languages spoken and written today, often there is a distinction between spoken and written version of the language, since the voice, face, and context all contribute to conversational interchange, but only punctuation marks and word order can speak on the written page. So the many iterations of Bible verses and also the letters circulated to early churches would have been the stiff style of written, not spoken teachings, right? And when the Greek source texts later went into Latin or all the vernacular languages, then this formal style was conserved, right? But to have lived in the presence and preaching, teaching, healing and blessing of Jesus or his nearest contemporaries and companions would have been all in the spoken voice; not the thundering cadences of KJV, for instance - beauteous though it was frames in the early 1600s. How ever could one go about reconstituting the conversational style of the teachings, parables, etc?

your heart check-up: tender or hardened?

The neighborhood church yard sign declared, "Your set-back might be a set-up for a come-back." That suggests that the things that disappoint or injure or side-track a person may frustrate original dreams and intentions, but that a bigger purpose could be the point: a change of one's heart, or sometimes breaking of one's heart. By focusing on the heart condition of Christians, the shape of one's congregational worship, the personal study and meditation, as well as the love for and service to one's neighbor all can be gauged in a new way that helps one to navigate daily and life-sized choices and aims.

The other day a radio report from Ethiopia included a sound snapshot from Christians lining up to face a holy relic from long ago. At first this seemed like a head-fake, an object of love and intention that memorializes a saint or sinner, rather than striving to know God and God's will. But on second thought (the literal meaning of respect is re+spectare, to Again See) and judged from this "heart-ology" perspective, perhaps the act of seeking to get near the relic and then to pour one's hopes and fears into that encounter may in fact function to soften or even break some hearts, thus making them subsequently open to those relationships one is part of. In other words, what may first seem a wrong path, in the end may lead to the same destination; in this case, a softened heart that is capable of touching both the harsh and gentle parts of a life well lived.

Christmas-ish in USA

Almost three years ago the gathering darkness near the winter solstice caught my eye when passing the inflatable lawn figures that have become so popular in the rotation of seasonal themes since 2005 as the prices from China dropped, the moving pieces grew more sophisticated, and the internal lighting became a standard feature. Seeing a similar display elsewhere this week triggered the observation that the spectacle nicely symbolizes the present moment of tension between the Jesus Story on the one hand and on the other hand, the consumers giving themselves permission to spend for themselves, others, and even for strangers sometimes.

First there is the relative size difference in secular and sacred figures in this 2015 photo; the 2018 display in a different city lacked the Mary/Joseph element altogether. Next there is the electrically powered, inflated hollowness of the brightly colored, computer-designed and trans-Pacific sourced factory products here.

Finally, there is "cheap and cheerful" philosophy of brightening up the neighborhood at little financial cost, and with nearly no social consideration or relationship involved. In other words, there is a "me, too" aspect of joining the consumers who seize the secular imagery, as if to say, "see everybody, I am a normal person, doing what Everybody does."

It is not too big a stretch to apply these observations to the social expressions now in transition in USA: secular take-over of formerly modest or subdued Kwanzaa, Hanukah, Christmas is electrically powers and inflated. Once unplugged the light goes out and the thing (both its physical space and its meaning) collapses. The bar for participation in popular (commerce-based) culture is low indeed, and it is relatively conducive to a nation of immigrants where possibly 10% of the census respondents speak a language at home other than English. When all you need is a few colorful tokens of an event like Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, or Easter/springtime, then anybody with money and a bigbox importing store nearby can play along. By comparison, commitment to a religious community or faith tradition ancient or modern takes months and years to cultivate.

So the next time you see an inflatable, consider the symbolism; not of the figures depicted, but of their construction, distribution, and display. They are hollow, dependent on electricity, and have little mass or persisting meaning. And yet, even so, year by year there seem to be as many or more than the previous year. Perhaps the post-season deeply discounted sell-off of inventory is just too hard to ignore in the minds of cost-conscious consumers.

Daniel translates as "God is my Judge" (standard for measuring matters)

The book of Daniel (beyond the part in the Lions' den) has so many parallels to the present day. But then, so too, the rest of the Bible's 1st and 2nd testaments are also part of the Living Word; open to each generation's meanings and musings. 

(1) He is a stranger in a strange land, a foreigner living with others of Judea now among the Babylonians. He probably fits into the customs of clothing, common language of the city, and other routines and rules, but all the while he holds fast to the covenant with the LORD. The same could be said for God seekers today who are living among the consumer society's siren call and the currents that dominate the airwaves and many interpersonal conversations. 

(2) The experience of living away from one's original land and society magnifies certain things, making them stand out when before perhaps such realities were invisible or taken for granted. So, too, the love of God the Creator was perhaps taken for granted, but while in Babylon this love become ever more cherished than before. Likewise for people living in 2018, the predominance of God-free habits and way of seeing perhaps helps to heighten the value of seeking after God for those who listen for the Maker's voice and for the Creator's presence. 

(3) In times of difficulty and seemingly impossible conditions Daniel continued to  pray and ask for God's help. This, too, offers instruction for people today. 

(4) The powerful king, Nebuchadnezzar, and later his successor, Belshazzar, were quick to praise the might of YHWH but slow to embrace the complete and exclusive meaning. Instead they bowed to the superficial parts, not the full reality. Today there are many who cling to the outward elements of organized Abrahamic religion (Islam, Judaism, Christianity) without digging deeper to touch the roots.

Probably there are many other lessons from this book for readers and the "hands and feet of God" out in the world today. but these are a few that come out of the weekly Bible study of these pages today.

in and out of focus - Crucifex? Loving-kindness? Churchianity?

This image from flickr puts the celtic crosses of an Irish westcoast churchyard in focus against the distant Atlantic sky. So sharply are the facsimile Roman death machines in focus that the true meaning and aspirational quality of being a Christ follower and God seeker becomes blurry by comparison. They say the funeral and burial customs are for the living, rather than the dead. So then does this display primarily refer to a moment in time when the bereaved show their belonging and conformity and consent of the organized religion of the place? Or it is all relatively unimportant to those who dwell on the heart of Christ's example; that is, to engage in loving-kindness with strangers as with friends and enter into mutual aid and fellowship? If the living see that message as primary, then the formal elements of grave stones, Order of Worship (liturgy), and "Sunday Best" clothes when attending the events at the church building all become comparatively unimportant. But if one's relationship to God the Creator and all-knowing, loving parent is built of material, tactile things like expressing one's high respect for the sacred memory of the crucified Son of Man, Son of God then this scene of well-crafted stones and carefully expressed rituals and status will be uppermost in waking consciousness of the bereaved at the time of death and in the years that follow.

In summary, it is arrangement of bodies, memories, and markers mostly for the bodies of the deceased, the hearts of the bereaved, the eyes of one's peers, the consideration of the Almighty, or the tacit acknowledgement of the Organized Religious Structures? All these things may be true at the same time, but perhaps only one of those meanings is uppermost for people at the time, and perhaps the same also for people now many generations since the time of separation and burial.

What you are afeared of - awe versus fear

Two different senses in the "fear your God" phrase from the Bible.

Evangelism means the belief and promotion of the Good News (Gospel accounts) of Jesus' life and what followed among the Apostles, including the many letters of Paul of Tarsus. By extension Evangelical churches and their congregations also emphasize the New Testament (also sometimes called 2nd testament) over the Old (first) Testament. However, at the present moment in USA among news media reports online and broadcast the political goals attributed to "Evangelicals" are contradictory. Most often this label is attached to social conservativism, rather than the model that Jesus demonstrated by humbly engaging with sinners, rather than to disregard or persecute them. And yet there sometimes are stories that feature self-identified Evangelical churches who stand up in defense of immigrant rights, homeless people, and others struggling under the tides of consumerism and capitalism, sometimes called "affluenza" (affluence as a kind of sickness).

This term, Evangelicals, can have diametrically opposed meanings --one sense is reactive to the Worldly culture and social change; it is driven by fear of people different and somehow threatening to the congregation's understanding of righteousness. The other sense is proactive to the Worldly culture and social change; it is driven by hope for people different to the congregation. In the same double-meaning sort of way, the concept of "fear your Lord" has been taken to mean opposing meanings, one is reactive and one is proactive. One is filled with dread and the other is filled with numinous thrill. The roots of the word 'enthusiasm' are 'filled with God' and that is the kind of awe that the Bible teaches for relating to God.

Meanings can shift in tone or texture, or indeed their main usage, from one generation to another and from one translation to another. But surely the LORD is something wild and made of power and glory, light and life; not dread and cowardice, reactive and bottled up like a small and controllable thing. So the next time that "fear the LORD, your God" comes into view or into hearing, be sure that AWE is what you understand by it so that you can feel the courage to reach out to "the least of these" instead of running for a hiding place.

Confusing the WORD of God with the printed artifact?

At times of prayer the classic structure demonstrated in the examples of Jesus in the Bible includes elements of Praise and Thanksgiving. Very often a prayer includes thanks for "the Word of God," meaning the translations found in whichever publication one relies upon. But thinking back, there was a before the printing press and low-cost or no-cost editions coming out in one's own vernacular phrases and structured into chapters and verses, very often with reader aids like table of contents or index, among other things. In those pre-1500s lifetimes the place to hear or learn the Word of God was in Latin and in a large, imposing building. Of course, the Jewish people committed their oral tradition onto Torah long before the birth of Jesus of Nazareth, hence the nickname among Muslims for all three Abrahamic religions, "People of the Book." But until recent centuries literacy was not widespread among these societies, nor were there printed or hand-written materials readily available to practice with. So in all these places and times the prayer to express thanks for "the Word of God" the mental image perhaps was not anchored in a bound volume or other physical artifact; rather the Word was about the message of love and forgiveness echoed again and again in those books brought together to form a Bible.

What about modern people surrounded by many translations and many-times no-cost Bibles: do people with Bibles printed in their own language confuse the published object with the teachings found inked to the paper? Or is the Word of God not tied to the wood-pulp that forms the paper? Among modern Jews there are efforts to recoup abandoned Torah from derelict, damaged, or destroyed temples. And among modern Muslims there is great offense taken when a physical copy of the Qu'ran is harmed or threatened in any way. Relative to both of these adherents, though, the Christians overall seem less concerned when shabby Bibles are recycled or destroyed or abused in some symbolic way. And yet, still at time of prayer there is thanks given for the Word of God, somehow blurring the inky printed lines and the spoken meanings themselves. At least among the faithful and the seekers long ago, there was no confusion between the artifact and the teachings. Whether decorated in gold and precious gems, or threadbare, or even absent altogether except for memorized passages, the Word of God stands on its own.

Christians as learners, as doers, and as a Way to Be

crucifix expressed in East Asia facial features

Last night a visiting minister and his wife spoke to a group of 15 or 20 people who came to the church building after supper to learn of missionary milestones the past 2 millennia among, with, and for speakers of Chinese,   particularly in Hong Kong, Macau, and the continent. In the brief space of 45 minutes and in the series of questions and answers that followed much new ground was covered, some of which reflected back on the group of mostly 40 - 65 year olds in the room. The   social and historical (and cultural, linguistic) conditions there and in Michigan are so very different and indeed the contrasts between well produced climate controlled, electronically-lit worship space here and the restricted options for gathering where   rental or building space is very limited is one contrast. The central government's sanctioning of a Catholic church & a non-denominational all-Protestant church on the one hand, and the counterparts that meet unofficially ('underground') is another difference   to expectations among seekers in USA. Another eye-opener, understandable and sensible but also unexpected and unfamiliar, is the image of the crucified Christ in the photo, with mother and father on either side and perhaps an angel overhead.

At the conclusion of the evening program and the several questions, closing with a prayer (in Chinese, by request), an overall wider sense of the world's Christian followers emerged. But also there was a hint of confusion   or Too Much Information. That is to say, is the way taught by Jesus so very esoteric and hard to grasp? Or is there just too much detail and interpretation for the average person to steer their own path each day and across their entire life course? When it   comes to keeping one's focus on the teachings, is there much difference between confusion among new Christians (1st generation) and for the people in societies long engaged in the words and relationships modeled by Christ? Is knowing too much (information)   an impediment to knowing Jesus in a relational, personal way? Hearing the others discuss various topics, comparisons, and clarifications with the visiting minister it seemed that each week's sermon, the rotating cycle of lectionary readings, and the titles   of ever more Christian-genre literature can easily overwhelm a person in search of God's face and Jesus' comforting presence.

This picture from the Table of Contents of a visual telling of major events in Gospel writings gives one inventory of the essence of the life told there. For people who are weak readers due to age, education, or other   impediment, this visual telling is helpful. But maybe its sparse telling also streamlines the excess of details that many people will struggle with.

click image for full-size file display: Gospel told in pictures

Striking the balance of confident agent in God's world AND humble service

clipart illustration of Master and Lord now as servant of love

Fortitude but also frailties; certainty but also not knowing; rock of strength but also water of life; deep self-esteem and respect but also humbleness; in charge of one's life and steward of its gifts but also recognizing God's Will Be Done (giving one's affairs over to God's direction). Each of these opposing pairs center on the vital tension between being mortal and child of God growing step by step while presuming there is a finite universe to be grasped and played well, but also striving to get past or get over our own limitations and boundaries of control to allow much bigger forces into our field of view and arena of participation.

Today's reading from John's gospel, chapters 12 and 13, in which Rabboni Jesus in the role reversal of servant, not master, washes the feet of all the apostles, overcoming Peter's refusal to allow such a thing, but also revealing that one of the brothers will betray Jesus. This mind-boggling illustration for all followers to strive for has many strands of meaning: servanthood, humility with dignity and respect, no pretension in the humanity of the engagement of one to the other. Likewise, we, too, are meant to embody seeming contradictions and overcome the initial tension we perceive between living our days with a plan or intention, but also remaining open-hearted in order to accommodate unplanned events or opportunities.

If it proves to be too hard to hold the opposing motions in constant tension, then another way is to alternate between the one position and the other; between being in the driver's seat but also being the passenger in God's own vehicle. A similar solution seems to work for the conundrum of seeking after God's nature, teachings, and will for today and for tomorrow. It is possible to take a position of certainty and increasingly deeper and more detailed knowledge, but also to alternate and take a position of humble ignorance. "The more I know, the more I see there is to know and thus feel my ignorance more keenly." Acting as though a limited body of knowledge can be encompassed in order to know God, a counterbalancing position is needed to break what is finite in order to glimpse what is infinite: just as we have a momentary feeling of triumph in apprehending a passage or idea or example, only to find out the limits of that momentary grasp of God's infinity. Here, again, there is a vital pulse produced by grasping and letting go; of understanding and then feeling ignorant; of feeling certain of God's Way and then feeling humble and lacking clear or simple answers.

Since we cannot directly and fully know God, this veering between fragments of knowing and then letting go of these pieces to embrace something bigger is, perhaps, the most productive way to mature in one's relationship to the Creator.

as Dorothy said, "There's no place like home"

Today's morning Bible Study pressed forward in the gospel of John; the scene of supper with Lazarus, Martha & Mary, who pours out the pricey aromatic Nard oil to wash the feet of Jesus. The practical man, and embezzler by John's account, Judas Iscariot, is much like we moderns - rationalizing that the pot could fetch market prices and the proceeds would better serve a few destitute souls than to be used on the feet of the Master. But one interpretation that rose above the discussion around the table was that Mary's gushing and extravagance impulse, perhaps, is a model of the Abundant Life when rooted in God's Way.

So much of learning to be an informed, committed, and activated pilgrim of the Way, following the Christ, seems to be about adopting set habits of action and seeing, and speaking. Being a disciple means to take to heart certain disciplines, like the ligaments that secure the motion of one's bones; the same root word found in re+ligare (religion), binding into alignment, over and over, again. And yet, those details are less important than the peace or contentment that follows. In other words, the teachings/rules/traditions (of whatever religion in the world - historical, today, or in the distant future) are instrumental or processual means, not the end goal. What matters is the change in one's heart; seeing with one's heart and not judging according to the many other dominant forces and perspectives of the historical age we occupy.

So often we seem to refer to external forces or conditions. We feature an invocation in the Order of Worship to invite God into our gathering at a place of worship, out in the field, or wherever the occasion arises --as if God were out doing something else and we call out for His attention and intention. In our prayers we address God with the formula that should include both thanks & praise, not simply prayer as mere joyous outpouring, or petition for personal favors. In this, again, we are presuming that The Creator is bounded and located with finite coordinates away from our present moment. Of course, this way of thinking fits our experience of physics and time/space. But maybe it is truer to say that these shout outs to a faraway all-knowing entity really are just a device and way to visualize ourselves apart from, distinct, and independent of the all-powerful Father/mother named YHWH. In other words, perhaps it is truer to understand our place in Creation as infused and immersed in God elementally, as integral to the fabric of creation; not separated from it. 

Just like the realization of Dorothy in The Wizard of Oz, who travels faraway seeking something valuable, but discovers that what she was searching for had been all around her and close to hand all along, right at home; right under her very nose. Hence the immortal line, "...there's no place like home." In the same way, the God we hunger for, seek after, and try to get to know better and better by life experience and wrestling with scripture and worship is not distant, but instead is all around us, everywhere, and discoverable in every faith tradition that humans engage with. Often the adherents and novices struggle with the stumbling blocks of details, rules, and optics that are meant to please higher status people. But sometimes a person will break forth, like Mary with the jug of aromatic nard oil, and gushes on pure impulse to non-verbally express the abundant vastness of God's love and the glory of loving one another.

How best to get to that point that Mary embodies? Perhaps the many impediments that hobble modern people have to be minimized: consumer appetites to acquire and steward ever more possessions, feelings of want - need - entitlement, peer comparisons that block one's field of view in looking to God as benchmark (whose favorable impression do we seek - peer or God). Something like Benjamin Maslow's Pyramid (1943, Hierarchy of Needs) needs to be climbed to reach the part where physical, social, emotional needs are more or less satisfied and one's heart is free to dwell on things like the fellow travelers on life's way - all living creatures, not limited to the human ones; or to dwell on the day to day opportunities to intervene and engage with others in a proactive way, rather than in a dismissive or reactive way, for example.

In the end, while we are called on to function as God's feet and hands (and eyes and ears), his Creation is so much bigger than any one person. And his way can be accomplished whether we seize the opportunities he provides and we fail or succeed (in our own eyes, or when judged by peers, or by The World). In the same way, as each person ventures to engage in God's world, sometimes in blind faith reaching out, the adherence to prescribed formulas, rituals, or other particulars are less important than the spark that is in one's heart. God is not keeping a report card for your appearance and your performance like some figure skating judge. Rather he knows your heart and wants it to grow bigger, more generous, and moved by impulse closer to the Abundant Life shown by Mary's example. Ours is a wild God, not a tame one. So, too, should our response be untamed, the more we get to know The Creator: meek and humble, yes, but capable of great power and the ability to touch one another's hearts. What might seem extravagant or Fools for God, actually might be what The Way is all about - living in abundance; not the physical kind, but the kind that bubbles up from within and without limit.

opening your heart, realignment points of reference

Having missed a week at the weekly table for Tuesday Men's Bible Study, I could feel the absence more sharply after rejoining the circle for opening prayer, reading John 12, and round-the-table banter and chewing the words, context, intention, and longer thread of the selection. Being solitary, no matter how deeply one reads or engages with online, broadcast, or recorded media, the experience is nothing like the give and take of dialog, either via telecommunication or face to face. For some reason the interchange of ideas and interpretations, references to lived experiences and one's own assumptions brought to light has a powerful effect. It is as if solitary study, praise or thanksgiving occurs in a boundless desert that offers no feedback, echoes, or other means of sensing one's location and passage through the landscape. But when there are others involved, then care must be exercised to receive the others' viewpoints with respect and let them settle momentarily, rather than to react by dismissing the perspective conveyed. As a result of this consideration for others' standpoint, one's own heart rises to the surface, exposed to the care given by others and exposed in order to engage and express care for others. In summary, by study and worship with others, one's own heart can grow and one's position can be gauged by reference to others' viewpoint and the words on the printed page. By extension, perhaps it is not only for Bible Study or small group reading and discussion of a selected books together that creates this sustained engagement and sustaining community of respect and care, perhaps this group dynamic is true as well of praise, thanksgiving, and worship - it is an intersection for many relationships ongoing; it is a weekly pulse in one's passage through the year and the cycles of one's life that helps one's heart to thrive (tender, not calloused or hardened) and that help's one to realign daily cares, keeping things in perspective to what matters most in a life well lived among others in the world.

This photo of the passages we talked about shows a lovingly marked up copy of one man's Bible. As he says, "it is an old friend by now; one that invites conversation and wondering out loud."

to judge or not to judge; to be judged or not to be judged

Tuesday Men's Bible Study dug into John 10 in which Jesus declares that he ..."comes for judgement." And yet elsewhere in the Bible the English translation says he ..."does not come to judge." After going round and round to split definitional hairs we all could see the twin meanings of 'judge' in the sense of absolute condemnation (or exoneration) versus the sense of evaluating or assessing with discernment to identify what the status of a subject may be. When Jesus comes ..."for judgement" perhaps this means the process can proceed when he is present as a catalyst. So while he himself is not performing the judge function, still it is by his presence that the process can take place.

The Bible makes it clear that mere mortals are no position to pretend to make rulings on another person's (or own) sin or to determine the worthiness of a person's relationship with Lord God. But in the years that we sail the Earthly waters, we can and should be ready to function as reference points and touchstones to each other, judging when a person may be slipping off track and trending toward sin. Pointing out a wrong turn is not the same as assigning blame (or credit), though. Pointing our another's sin can be a prickly thing since "the pot calling the kettle black" is equally likely as the desired outcome of concern for one another being received in the rightful spirit. The Bible tells how to approach what appears to be an offender by going with one or two others and together in solidarity expressing care and being the sounding board that the person can benefit from. As they say, "Until the person knows that you care, then they don't care what you know." One reason to meet "off stage" is to reduce the sensitivity to public gaze, scrutiny, or pressure. 

As creatures filled with emotional response and the instinct for peer benchmarking, it is no good simply teaching or preaching for all brothers and sisters-in-Christ to ignore those sharp feelings or to build one's identity and self-worth on what is eternal, rather than the things filling modern life and preoccupying our budget-conscious minds:

• consumer habit of thinking to judge what is good use of time or money
  
• status measured in Worldly increments or accumulation or personal display
  
• hedging one's bets: to trust in God theoretically, but holding tight to checkbook practically
  
• seeing the events and personalities of nowadays as a standard, an ideal, or reference point
  
• telling your life trajectory of events not in God's terms, but in corporate, consumer, or advertisers' language
  
• perceiving others only by external clues, not looking past the surface and discerning the heart of (self and) others
  

Probably this list is only a fraction of what the modern experience of compartmentalizing God talk, prayer, weekly hour of organized religion ---on the one hand, and routine work-day habits of thinking, relationship, and reaction --on the other hand. With practice, though, it should be possible to see the World with bi-focal vision: one lens for the Worldly regulations and methods to get things done, and one lens to see with one's heart what is maybe not visible to the eye or head. Your true self, and what it is that God loves in you will become the new normal and displace the cacophony of modern lives.

Exodus from Egypt long ago... still alive today in Passover commemoration

This Congregational Church began welcoming people to the commemoration and celebratory Seder supper about 6 years ago and has grown little by little. Few, if any, come as ethnic, cultural, or religious Jews. But most have some relationship with Christianity and would acknowledge its roots 2000 years ago in the life and times of Jesus of Nazareth and his followers and disciples. During those 80 generations or so the Seder details have ebbed and flowed according to host, the available foods, those attending, and the location (society and language of those taking part). But the central message of liberation from slavery remains unaltered. As the historical and cultural situation has changed, though, the significance and yearning for freedom and the recognition of slavery has waned and waxed; for example, USA slave holders until the conclusion of the Civil War in 1865 might view the institution of slavery differently to people today when indentured (undocumented, smuggled) laborers live shadowed lives, including the slave lives among sex trafficked young people.

Considering all that has changed (and yet all that has not changed of human yearning, preoccupation, life events) it is perhaps surprising to know that Seder fellowship, teaching, and fellowship lives on in many parts of the world, far, far away from the original commemorations at the east end of the Mediterranean Sea.

Give (your attention). Pay (your attention). Be (attentive)

Tuesday Men's BS (Bible Study) continues in John's Gospel, Chapter 3. Week to week pace is slow but steady, since the discussions and life experiences that enter in seem to be chewed exceedingly fine. When we got to the part about Jesus declaring his blood (what God gives his creatures life with) and body (physical, Earthly presence) must be taken in (eaten) by his followers, many of those trailing behind him turned away. Then addressing the 12, Jesus confirms that these are the ones he's chosen and among them one is a devil (shaytan; satan). 

     One of the men at the Tuesday morning discussion elaborated some of the role playing of that fallen angel, Lucifer: Accuser, Deceiver, and Tempter. Against those manipulations we have the Lord's Prayer, given in the book of Matthew: (please) "lead us NOT into temptation." Among media-savvy national leaders in some of the countries, elected ones or positions seized simply by brute power, these same 3 functions can be seen: accuses, deceives, and tempts those paying attention with visions of grandeur. This likeness to the functions of Shaytan is significant.

     Reading the list of functional roles in reverse, perhaps there is a recipe for what is good instead of evil: not to accuse means to hear out in full and with trust and love. Not to deceive means to be honest, caring, and truthful (not truthiness veneer, but the deep-down core identity). And not to tempt means to reduce risk of distraction, waste of time, resources, gifts, words, energy and effort such that the person should not be deflected or be led astray.

     Yet as entertainment and information (news media) seems to get louder, more intrusive and abrasive, more present in one's waking thoughts, one result is that there is too much to pay attention to, too much to give attention to, too much to be attentive to. In such a state of affairs, "attention" becomes more valuable than money, status, or reputation/image. So the small amount of attention that each person has --no matter how rich or poor, famous or unknown, sick or hale-- is worth sharing with others. It is all the more precious now than ever before. When the noise, distraction, and distorted mirror of humanity is blasted into our lives to this degree, then it becomes hard to find role models and stories of lives well lived that consist of God's love and the guidance handed down in the pages and lives told in the Bibles.

     Digital fasting (turning off the stream of entertainment and too much information and clamoring misinformation) may rest one's own mind and give some perspective, but it does not alter the wider society and smaller clusters of community that make up the larger world. Wherever the answers may lie to this inexorable erosion of humanity and the loosening grip of God's love in one's heart or waking mind, the very first step is to recognize that there is a problem; to name it and then work out possible responses for the sake of self, others, and generations yet to come.

your love of God >knowing God >seeking God

At the weekly men's Bible study there was a full table of caffeinated thinkers and seekers. The Gospel of John has been the location for wrestling with God's word in our times. A few weeks ago it was Nicodemus' visit under the cover of darkness to meet Jesus (Chapter 3), and last week continuing today is was the scene in Samaria where the woman of many husbands runs into Jesus at the well in the middle of the day, unaccompanied.

     We read the printed pages and thing of the omniscient narrator (John) and the perspective of Jesus in his public phase of ministry. But I wonder what the Samaritans made of the ongoing tension between the other players - the stooges set up by Roman occupiers to play the role of (Jewish) king; the Sanhedrin and Pharisees; the Zealots; the work of John the baptizer and then the Nazarene carpenter and rabbi? Since mainstream/orthodox Jews regarded Samaritans as strayed or benighted Jews, I wonder if things looked different from the Samaritan point of view: did they also see value in making sacrifices at the Temple; in keeping kosher; in following the high holy days including Pesach (passover)?

     One of the guys around the table talked about the way that parables work: they are different than myths meant to tell how come things are the way that they are. Instead parables work in the opposite direction, causing listeners to question the way things are and to look at things in a new way in order to discover new meaning or significance. And the apparent untidy and unbecoming passages that appear in scripture, too, cause readers to register the tension or apparent contradiction and come face to face with the idea that God's way is not Man's way. We are prone to seize a small sharp fragment of the Bible and hold dearly to the moment of clarity, disregarding the other parts. In doing so we convince ourselves that we have made sense of God's Will and that everybody should cleave to the small fragment and build their personal faith and daily interchange with others on that alone.

     How does Men's Bible Study fit in with seeking, knowing, and loving God? Head knowledge alone does not reveal secret wisdom (mystics or Greek tradition of chasing the most esoteric and subtle teacher to reveal hidden knowledge), but for some believers this is a medium for interacting, articulating, and testing one's understanding by connecting to experience and other sorts of knowledge one has accumulated. There seems to be a virtuous circle: know more stuff and grasp God's character more closely. Know God in a personal, relational sense (know =mutual recognition or personalized trust and care; versus know =facts memorized and organized for recall) and thereby love God more, seek God more. All of this builds the next: know, love, seek. This is different to testable, book knowledge of ritual, chapter and verse, splitting theological hairs, and so on. Ultimately all this centers on the (sacred) heart, not intellectual nimbleness. One's heart must be open to embrace God; open by being broken (circumstances of health, finance, interpersonal relations, encountering great wonder or beauty) or opening of its own accord when reaching for something bigger than oneself.

reflecting on Men's Bible Study - Nicodemus, curiosity & vigilence (not doxa), and spiritual growth

Plowing through the rich field of John's gospel, as usual, we read only a few lines of the 3rd chapter before all sorts of wonderings led us down multiple tangents that tie into larger matters of personal life, decisions and priorities, local church particulars and world events. Among these by-ways were ideas for reflection like these (google image search for 'jesus and nicodemus' provides the illustration posted here).

1. Charles Dickens, among others, assigned special meaning to many of his characters (Ebenezer, as in Scrooge, has its Biblical significance, for instance). Perhaps the name 'Nicodemus' tells us more than his ethnic foundation (Greek-culture/language Jew trained up with other Pharisees; maybe something like Saul/Paul in that sense). The Internet gives the roots of this name, "a personal name of Greek origin, composed of the elements nike 'victory' + demos 'people'." According to the actions and words attributed to Nicodemus in gospel, truly his name's roots are borne out.
2. Rather than a command and control, top-down style of instructing new Christians and new believers, the upshot of this morning's conversation seems to be that the most effective way to develop deep and sustaining roots is to cultivate curiosity and vigilance so that followers of the Way may step into the unknown in faith with the attitude of seeking and venturing, though unable to see clearly into the distance, at least one step at a time is illuminated so that the person can proceed. Doubts, wondering, questions all are to be encouraged over rote and recitation. Habits and engaging tasks trump perfect memory and quotation; process over content, strategies instead of static fragments of a glorious whole.
3. Extended discussion went back and forth around the idea of the Holy Spirit entering one's thoughts and actions; somehow this presence could be interpreted to mean that such persons who are (semi) aware and respond to the comforting Spirit are growing spiritually more mature. And yet the imagery of "jars of clay that hold great treasure" also comes to mind - no matter how prestigious or impressive the vessel, it is the contents that are greatest in value, and these contents we mortals only temporarily touch; it is not ours. We are simply stewards who incidentally benefit by holding that treasure. And no matter how hard you strive toward some image of righteousness or emulating the heart and life experience of Jesus, any spiritual growth is so tiny by comparison to the infinity of God's glory. That does not mean it is pointless to strive to advance one's wisdom, discernment, scope of experience among man and God, but that enhanced self-consciousness or depth of humanity does not result in moral superiority or extreme humility to out-shine one's earlier self or exceed one's peer (reference) group. Put into the language of sin (veering from the path, missing the target), you can say that is well and good to strive to keep on track (righteousness in the midst of temptation, preoccupation, distraction), and doing so will carry you further down the path, but the destination will always be over the next hill; it is enough to strive and any glory that comes of such a life of striving is not one's own credit or ownership, but belongs to the Creator. In capsule summary: do strive for righteousness and extending one's spiritual maturity, but any perceived gains belong to God, not a trophy of one's own.

Making straight the way of the LORD –heart to see, eyes to hear, ears to taste with

True Heart or Sacred Heart are images used to describe Jesus and by extension the Holy Spirit and indeed the Creator of all. But what does this special attention to maturing and growing one's heart really mean? The full answer probably would require a book or more to explore. But here are a few intersections when speaking of 'heart'.

One meaning is to see past the surfaces that fill up our waking experience; things like categories or labels or brands – of denominations, ethnicity, genre or even the roles we play during the day ('worker', spouse, sibling, friend, stranger) and over the course of the year and indeed life cycle. Seeing past this first impressions we catch hints and glimpses of what lies under the surface; the person inside what looks like an old person, a mentally distressed person, an 'enemy' or perpetrator of crimes convicted of harming others, a foreign language speaker, or even across species – to see beyond the category of 'pet' or 'livestock' or 'shellfish' and consider that creation and consciousness also inhabit these non-human forms of life.

At the dentist office the other day, just for a moment, I caught myself imagining the supporting staff and professionals in more 3-dimensional view (not just communicating in the fixed dialog of office business or dental topics) to include their outside responsibilities, hobbies or pursuits, and so on. The same is true when I have bumped into a person familiar in one setting now in another context; for example, meeting church friend at movie theater by chance, or seeing one's coach or teacher in the grocery story, or seeing a childhood friend at the airport among a sea of strangers. In each case we are invited, or maybe forced, to see past the surfaces and routine vision. Putting a person or experience that fits into one setting suddenly into a new frame or context somehow opens up the meaning; what once seemed unchanging and something of certainty, at least for a moment, is open for negotiation, exploration, and reinterpretation. It becomes alive and is again in motion.

Another meaning of Christianity as a religion to grow one's heart is the modern concept of "emotional intelligence," not knowing something purely by rational logic or verbal engagement using powerful analytical tools, but knowing something in personal terms, in relational sense, through indirect and imperfect perception or intuited meaning. Stated in terms of person to person, sustained interactions this 'heart' means to see the other person with empathy (the person's own terms and perspective, not your own). It further means to see the other person non-verbally, relying instead on the direct perception (not exactly mind-reading or telepathy) of 'feeling' or 'sensing' the other person's wellness, righteousness, struggles and strengths. Maturing followers of The Way (Jesus as the embodiment of The Way, "follow me") will trust more and more their heart to lead them in small and large decisions with others and for oneself.

A third meaning of developing one's heart is being able to see past the details that can preoccupy, distract, or delay one's engagement in larger meanings and higher value matters such as one's search for God's face and presence, one's intent to build a righteous heart, one's vision of those who constitute "one's neighbors" (the ones we are to love, even as much as we love ourselves; indeed, equal to our love of God). In other words, compared to one's less spiritually self, today you have increased capacity to tolerate lack of structure, absence of rules, conditions that once would have seem disordered, and indeed, alternate ways of worshiping God through prayer, sacrifice, and service to others. What once was narrow, now is wider; much like the visual image of the animated story of the Grinch who Stole Christmas, his heart once was 3 sizes too small, but after the revelation of the meaning of Christmas, his heart is shown to grown even bigger than full-size. His heart becomes very big, indeed. In a similar way, the zealous seeker of The Way will experience an ever bigger capacity to love others, including a wider range of others different to one's self and one's familiar world.

Surely there are many other ways in which 'heart' serves as the central idea of Christianity; perhaps synonymous with 'love' (the many distinct words for love in the New Testament Greek: philos, eros, agape/karitas). But the above meanings stand out most to me these days: seeing past the surfaces of the person (what you see on the outside upon first impressions), something wider than emotional intelligence alone, and seeing past the details to glimpse the bigger pictures; not to "sweat the small stuff" in one's day or lifetime.

Time's swift passing - quickly fly the years

The past many months a couple of phrases or concepts have lingered in my mind as I look around me and wonder at the beauty and ugliness of the positions we occupy on the planet. One is the Hindu idea of "darshan" in which you pay respect to a sacred place - a peak, a river, a tree, perhaps. When I see a sunrise or sunset, or stop to admire a tree in bloom, that is some kind of darshan, I think. Another phrase is "just passing through" to sum up the attitude of impermanence; of accepting that one can't own or hold or control something indefinitely and so it makes sense to keep a loose grip on the material parts of your life and to "store up your treasures in heaven" rather than among Earthly things. A third idea that comes to the front of my mind from time to time is "helder" a Dutch or Germanic word for bright shining, silvery luminousness that sometimes comes around the time of rising or setting sun when the rays are reflecting off the many surfaces high and low, surrounding you is lightness. By extending that feeling to lightness of emotion, free of burden or obligations there is a brightness in one's heart or outlook that results. The fourth term that wells up in me sometimes stems from the quote attributed to John Lennon, that "Life is what happens while you are busy doing something else." In other words, we may believe that the point in life or the purpose one is striving to achieve is one thing, but only later on in retrospect, or when someone reframes the events in a new light do we recognize what is most of value in the flow of time; consumerism gives us a "head fake" that makes us lean to the right, while the true direction to pay attention to might be just the opposite to what we are in the habit of assuming or accepting.

All four of these together add up to a hyperawareness of time's  passing ("...merrily, merrily, merrily - life is but a dream," as the nursery song puts it) and the importance of seeking and conserving was matters most and then sharing that with others on the road of life.

The Gift (not Marcel Mauss' classic)... more blessed to?

That book from around the time of WW I offers lots of insight into the social strings attached to giving and receiving in many cultures then and now. But this week's talk about 2 Corinthians, chapter 5 or 6, I seem to recall, brought up ideas of being a humble receiver of another's gift. And while the adage of "more blessed to give than to receive" is still true, there is something to be said for enabling a person to offer their gift; to make it possible and encouraged to give generously. In other words, it takes 2 to complete the blessing: the giver and the receiver. So what shapes one's heart and becomes a desirable habit and example to one's peers is Gratitude when receiving (attitude of thankfulness without any baggage of expectations or entitlements) and Generosity when giving of oneself: take a posture of gratitude when receiving, express generosity and open-hearted spirit when giving [not burdened by obligation or other social friction]. As Marcel Mauss documented, there is much, much more than an exchange of goods or sentiments at the moment of transferring and asset, idea, or cash-equivalent. Some of these imponderables become thinkable on the pages of Krista Tippet's latest book of highlights taken from radio/podcast interviews for her show, On Being.org. Book title, Becoming Wise - at some points shedding as much light as some of the lines found in Bibles!

consumer smarts are sort of a "head fake" mis-leading you to preoccupations far from God

If you are seeking after God, in some small way hoping to get to know the Creator just a fraction as well as the Creator knows you, then the modern age is flooded with distractions, fall roads, preoccupations and ordinary occupations that require so much waking attention that the quiet voice of eternity is hard to notice, even if you are listening and looking for it. Each life stage in one's trajectory comes with its own sources of anxiety, joy, and distractions. But on top of those biological and social sequences there are financial pitfalls and quicksands of detail that swallow up your time and attention. Way more substances are available for abuse and self-medication. Increasingly solitary lives thin out the once close-at-hand social connections and cross-references that held a person in place for firmly that before, both for good and for ill. Above all else the consumerism of the past 80 or 90 years that mass produced, mass distributed, and made possible mass consumption of material thing, as well as services also took up more an more of one's mind.

     In the days when a person had a room or two of Earthly possessions, upon death these were shared out simply. But now there are hoarders with barnfuls and storage units filled with ever more accumulation. Decision making becomes habituated to calculating the price per unit of brand A versus brand B; or for the less mathematically inclined a purchase decision may be shaped by the more recent encounter with a coupon or advertisement, if not in print or broadcast then personalized to one's Internet browser or mobile phone. But whatever explanation seems strongest, the people of today in the economically developed countries, at least, seem to have more obstacles that separate them from the Creator. So any pursuit of God's ways must involve overcoming the ordinary preoccupations with time schedule, car maintenance, coordinating to children's programmed lives, and so on. Much of what really matters in the Kingdom cannot be priced or valued in consumer terms. The concept of the "head fake" that is used to describe football, soccer, basketball, among others may shed some like on this problem of distraction and misguided effort.

     The move is crude but often effective against one's opponent or person who is in pursuit of the ball. The person who performs the head fake gives the false impression of turning in one direction by the normal signal of moving one's eyes and head to the place to go next. The pursuer sometimes believes that indeed is the direction to get ready to go. But then the double-thinking player who is in possession of the ball does something unexpected by moving in a different direction, contrary to the way the eyes or head were indicating. In much the same way most people rely on signals and signs to know what to expect next; what direction things will move to next; where to pay one's attention. And yet so much of modern conveniences and the mantras of advertisers that you should buy their product or service to save time, money, or maybe the biggest motivator of all, to reduce inconvenience and effort. By measuring one's life by those yardsticks it is possible to imagine some sort of increase or rising value. But all that is beside the point; those preoccupations are a sort-of "head fake" that we are tricked by. Years pass and then one day we awake and wonder where the time has gone and what was it all about, anyway? What to do.

     Like the folks in the 12-step self-help plans begin with, "the first step in solving a problem is to know that there is a problem." So this modern life 'head fake' can be tackled first be looking out for it, identifying it, being deliberate instead of "auto-pilot" in reaching for your money to scratch whatever itch you may feel (or be told by advertisers that you may be feeling right now). After becoming self-conscious about the cost of giving up one's own thinking and accepting what is advertised to be 'normal' and desirable, then at least there is some space available to look around for God in all this modern life and to stop long enough to listen or even to think. Moving aside the baggage of modern daily concern out of the way makes it possible to seek after God with less fetters. It is a good start and one that also brings you to a similar playing field that your ancestors may have walked up; a place less cluttered, although filled with its own sources of anxiety and distraction, no doubt.

The early morning hours are dark this time of year. A few days after the national holiday of Thanksgiving the lights and lawn decorations for Christmas start appearing. This one includes the festive lights in addition to a sturdy crucifix covered in lights and in the window on the porch is a 5 pointed star. The cross is where the earthly life of Jesus will end near the time of Passover, 33 years after his Christmastime birth, celebrated at the time of year with least light. Year after year the symbols and other decorations that reference Christianity appear here and there. And yet the moment we presume to comprehend God's infinity, we are bound to be mistaken. After all, how can a finite mortal mind grasp something that is infinite? The same goes for the 99 names of God. To confine the Lord God to a single name is impossible, foolish and deluded. And yet, feeble creatures that we are, we crave something definite; not infinite. By presuming to know the name of God we tend to believe that somehow we therefore know God. But a better way might be to work on unlearning your knowledge of God, since it is simple or mistaken inevitably. Neither a star (over the place where the baby lies in a manger) nor a crucifix fully stands for God. The false sense of grasping God's meaning and presence is best counteracted by unlearning one's assumptions about God.

Be a Christian? Christian is something you do?

Which is the goal and which is the process; which the means, which the ends? 

Does one do lots of interactions (not for merit-making, but for training one's heart) in order to be more Christ-like? Or should the emphasis be on maintaining and thriving a heart of servanthood, righteousness attitude, and awareness of gratitude in order the actively engage with one's world in a more Christ-like way?

Perhaps the best clue comes from one of the names for God, "I AM." If the goal is to train one's heart to seek out God in places, people, and events big or small, then the actions along the way are facilitating this goal, but the action or lack of action by itself does not a Christian make. The path of older brother Jesus in an embodied experience; a chance to interact with the social and physical environment. That is to say, faith without action is incomplete; and yet, merely going through the motions, however charitable they may seem, does not particularly train one's heart. In other words, actions are necessary, but by themselves are not sufficient to produce and expand one's place in the world. Therefore strive for a heart that seeks after God and delights in the relationships formed with others travelimg this path, too.

The closing lines of my friend's lifetime poem show how important the lived, 3-dimensional, embodied experience is.

The purposeful meaning floods over me

To relate to our creator in time.

This is our task while we are living;

And its purpose can well be divine.

I must do it through personal relationships

For I conceive God in only this way.

As we live in true dialogue together

We become part of creation today.

W.P.R

St. Jovite, Quebec

[full text at http:// tinyurl.com/wpr1968]

Here I am, Lord

In this compact phase is much of what it means to be God's child; God's servant; God's heir; God's hands and feet.

By reaching upward and outward and declaring you are here and receptive, it means you are poised to listen for direction or connection, your eyes are open and seeking God's direction, and your heart is softened enough to accept gladly God's will.

..."Thy will be done, on Earth as it is in heaven" points to the foundation of this new heaven and earth in which the Kingdom of God is built in one's heart. From that foundation all things are possible; all boundaries can be crossed, all obstacles can be overcome, or at least can be grappled with. And so, among the many messages, needs, wonderings, and seeking that makes up one's week and worship experience, or even comprises one's entire life course, the part about opening one's heart is perhaps the most important, with everything else the detail and furniture that can be moved around that space in one's heart. Thus the study of Greek, the peculiarities of translation between languages and historical periods, the exercise of servanthood and making offerings, etc all follow from the basic goal of changing one's heart from "zero sum game" or "homo economicus" (mere consumer units whose purpose is to "maximize utility") to the heart that Jesus exhibited for disciples and those who met him: a place where "giving to Caeser what is Caeser's" can co-exist with "God's Kingdom here on Earth." If we all could see past the texture, rhythm, flavor and habits of Order of Worship, denominational differences, and customs in one's own family ways, then perhaps in some small way hearts could shift from the worldview trained up in classrooms, online and found in movies or TV. Instead there could be a growing fraction of the wider society that sees connection, not separation between one and all; and sees service in kindness as the highest calling, not reaching a high net worth to pass on to others at death.

In the outbursting of "here I am, Lord" is the posture and the heart that is eager to seize God within one's daily routines and the lives one touches along the way. Stumbling over the meaning of trinity, the interplay of faith and works, the mercy and justice, as well as suffering and joy, instead we should dwell on the things that improve (and minimize the things that distract or harden) one's heart. It is, after all, and ultimately a Gospel of the heart; a kingdom within you and me.

if God were a place holder in our algebraic imaginations

setting aside the unknown allows you to get on with grasping the subject

The 'people of the Book' all worship the God of Abraham, who before their meeting is described as chief among the gods, also named YHWH. But each brings different linquistic, historical and geographical particulars to their vision and relationship to God and each other. Having heard many passages of the Bible read and preached more than once, and having grown accustomed or complacent in the regularity of the liturgical year, at some moments my hearing of the message jumps off the tracks and then it all seems a bit hollow or has the sense of trying too hard to force the world view to work in each person's circumstances and changing times we inhabit. For example, instead of freely resonating with the praise and preaching of God's goodness; of doing as did Jesus when reaching out in response to strangers, this morning the possibility of God being a signifier or place holder entered my mind. Suppose it is the weekly declaration of our love of God that makes it so, not any sort of external flow of reality. In other words, you can 'fake it until you make it' by living a righteous life, forgiving sin and asking one's owns sins against others to be forgiven. By pressing forward as if the Kingdom already has come, then indeed something that looks and feels of the Kingdom does indeed take shape; at least in one's own heart and responsiveness to others.
       Perhaps this is overthinking; after all, mere mortals can dance verbal or analytical circles around scripture, but the full and true meaning will always be bigger than we can wrap our minds around. But there does seem to be something in the observation that we see one thing, but mistake for another. We call the beginning of the church worship service an invocation, as if some external force is hailed. In fact the work of calming the restless mind for a moment, of opening one's heart, and of paying attention to one another all takes place in one's self; not an external invocation but an internal one. Likewise, we look far away for God's will, but if the God notion is instead a place holder, then it is rather for us to look inward for that will of goodness and hunger for mercy, love, and righteousness. This string of reasoning seems to hold together from Protestant context and custom of discussing, but I wonder if the same wondering can take place from a Muslim or Jewish point of view.

win the race versus run the race

click for full size, or see https://www.flickr.com/photos/respres/13768813703

The imagery of competition does not seem to be very prominent in either Jewish or Christian Bibles. Economic success is not frowned on, but with wealth comes burdens different to those of poverty; a weight of responsiveness, responsibility, stewardship, highest and best use, and so on. So what is the role of striving relative to one's peer group (versus striving to beat your own best records; or rising to your fullest ability). Surely God knows what one is capable of, even better than one's own sense of physical, emotional, and spiritual limits. And we are told of God's unconditional love, in spite of sloth, stupidity or mean spiritedness, and the many other frailties that take one's eyes off of God.
       It seems to defy logical syllogism or linear thinking that a person should seek to be ever more righteous and closer to God; to more perfectly hear and respond to God's call. But that no matter how badly we fail (or succeed), the consequence to one's relationship to God is the same - unbreakable love; at least God's unchanging love of his creatures. Perhaps it is the other side that displays the most shift in consequences: a person getting closer and closer to God's will and heart will reciprocate the bottomless love that God has for his people. Whether we have a good day or a bad day; God is still unbending in his love for us, but our hearts move closer or farther from God's will, depending on our circumstances on life's arc, or over the course of a single day.
       Moving to another seeming paradox: We are taught to be "in the world but not of the world," to engage in relationships with other sinners, but to guard against (and remove ourselves from) keeping bad company. We are exclusive (the gate is narrow) but work to make our doors open to all (the road is wide), to meet people where they are (inside the church building or in the street). We want to be righteous, but acknowledge we are sinners. We want to advance in (interior) moral stature but with our feet of clay we shy from (exterior) moral superiority. We want to harness a competitive spirit as a motivator to do better (than our old selves; possibly to keep pace with mentors) and yet we want to regard all in common and equal terms. Somehow this all spells out a certain tension.
     So, yes, run the race your hardest; hopefully without trampling others along your way. But know that how long you run or how quickly you reach the finish line, God's love is given in grace. You may be motivated by benchmarking your progress in reference to peers, or even in reference to your own precedents, but however that may shape your own heart and your own expression of love for God, the part shown you by God will not be any less or any more. It is full and complete, come rain or shine. Getting back to the picture above and the figurative language of races, winning, gold medals, and competitors, a good summation of God's love and our place along the road of mortal life is consider yourself a winner, no matter what the worldly games may be: having the mindset or heart of a winner will serve you better than striving to win the race itself.